Tuesday, July 15, 2014

A German bachelor party

From our Wedding Season files.

Bachelor and bachelorette parties are common in today's Germany and quite similar to such events elsewhere.

The typical trip to Las Vegas is obviously not common, although there are anecdotes of people with the requisite time and money going to Las Vegas for their party.

The Spanish island of Mallorca is one destination for German grooms and their buddies, but most of the time it is a more local affair. You have your paintball outings, go cart racing, tree top zip lining followed by heavy drinking, the supposedly last ever visit to a  nudie club or the plain local pub crawl, which sometimes ends in a very real crawl.

Here is one bachelor party tale that made us smile. It also underlines the importance of good, clear communication.

The friend charged with organizing this bachelor party asked the groom: What is it you would really like to do?

Ah, man, I don't know. Whatever crap you can come with.

Okay. [Yes, they do use "okay" here, too.]

The organizer and two helpers set out to plan. Once they had agreed on the main surprise, their first trip took them to the local plumber. The question 'do you have a discarded toilet bowl we can have for free', startled the craftsman, but he smiled when they explained the purpose of the acquisition.
Heavy duty industrial cleanser and silicone were next, and the final purchase consisted at buying up all the chocolate pudding mix at the town's small grocery store.

They took possession of the laundry room in the organizer's house and kept the door locked at all times.
On the day of the party, the mother of the organizer had the unexpected pleasure of seeing her son cook up a gallon or more of chocolate pudding and not eating any of it. Instead, the finished product disappeared in the basement laundry room.

The helpers showed up after work, and the three soon left after announcing that the laundry room was free again.

Is this a good time to mention that the party organizer was also the best man and had been given the rings a few days before?

That night, the groom was meticulously blindfolded, led into the room at the community center and gently pushed down on a chair.

What have you got?

You'll see. Just a second. This is gonna be so much fun. You'll love how soft... Eh, shut up.

A stripper? the groom asked.

Give me your hand, and lean forward.

One of the helpers removed the blindfold while the other pushed the extended hand into the brown contents of the toilet bowl.

The groom gagged and blushed as the group burst out into laughter and taunts.

You know, the wedding rings are in there. If you want them...

The evening went on from there.

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