Saturday, June 1, 2013

Possession of umbrella is plausible cause

The German paper Frankfurter Allgemeine Zeitung, not known for left leaning opinion, reports that riot police in Frankfurt, Germany, regards possession of an umbrella at today's Occupy demonstration as plausible cause for detention of demonstrators.

The K-landnews team sees this as proof that German security forces are stretched extremely thin and are not given all the resources needed to maintain public order.

An untrustworthy source told the K-landnews:
They are so overstretched that none of the officials had an opportunity to check the weather forecast for today.
Rumor has it that the police were traumatized by the incessant rain during the month of May. 
A psychiatrist close to the forces of law and order is planning to petition the body responsible for the next psychiatric manual DSM-6 to include a new disorder called PTRD (post traumatic rain disorder) in order to ensure that public officials who  mistreat demonstrators are not treated as criminals but recognized for what they are: sick people who need treatment and compassion.

TheEditor of the K-landnews not only sympathizes with the police but accuses the demonstrators of narrow minded thinking:
If I should ever cover a demonstration in the rain or with expected rain, I would never carry an umbrella. I would treat rain as an opportunity to get a free shower. This should be most welcome by anti-capitalist eco friends for its dual significance, you don't pay the greedy water company for the shower, and that shower is as environmentally friendly as it can possibly be.
Don't forget that the huge rainfall (almost 200% of normal) happened in May. Today, as you can verify if you don't believe me, we are in June. This is a whole different ballgame. Carrying an umbrella in June is not the same as carrying an umbrella in May.

Weaponry of protesters can be seen here:

https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BLsNY1QCIAAkThY.jpg:large

No comments:

Post a Comment